In life every one of us at some point or the other meets failure.The feeling of failure leaves a bitter taste in our mouths, it leaves you feeling miserable. I remember failing my first test at college, it was unnerving. I was so anxious that I missed even the obvious questions. When I got the results I beat myself over it for sometime like “how could you miss this you dummy” and that’s how I felt, like a dummy.
Now your failure may not be connected with school at all. Your’s might concern a project at work, your business, your relationship, your health and general wellness. You made a mistake and found yourself in a sticky situation. You got cheated on your money.The bottom line; failure wears many faces to different people.
No matter what face your failure wears one thing’s for sure; it sucks to fail. When it happens to us we start seeing ourselves in the lens of that failure. We then begin to tell ourselves that just because we failed that one time there is no hope left, we are done for.
If you are thinking that we are too hard on ourselves then you are right, we are. One mistake does not determine your worth neither does it define your entire life. Think of all the other good things you’ve done, things you accomplished and things that make you proud to be you. They are a lot and it is not fair to beat yourself up over one mistake, one misfortune.
Life is richer when we celebrate our successes rather than focusing on our failures.
What if instead you saw failure as an opportunity to grow? You are a sum total of your experiences in life, the good and the bad. Hard times build your character. When you fail in some way learn from it because behind every failure lies a lesson. Failure to learn will lead you into going through the same circle of defeat. Make mistakes,learn from them and grow!
You can’t let your failures define you. You have to let your failures teach you.
I want you to begin to shift your perspective right now. Failing a test doesn’t make you a failure. Do not let failure define your image, who you are, rather learn from the lessons that failure so willingly offers. Why did I fail that test? I was anxious. I was not in the right frame of mind. I crammed and crammed and memorised because I was afraid to fail. I never asked for help from friends when I did not understand things from class.
When you begin to dig deeper into why you failed you learn valuable lessons. They are things you didn’t do and things you didn’t do well . The experience helps you to become more knowledgeable so that next time you won’t repeat the same mistakes. So there you have it, instead of letting failure change your Perception of yourself, learn from it and growwww! Failure is a wonderful teacher’s instead of fearing it face it head on and learn every lesson it has to teach.
Thomas Edison had failed to make a battery so many times that a reporter came up to him and asked “how does it feel to have failed?” “What do you mean?”, Edison replied, “I didn’t fail, I found 1000 ways on how not to make a battery.” This response blows my mind. Failure is not an end in itself. I didn’t fail that test , I found 1 way in which I wasn’t supposed to prepare for an exam. It is the lesson that counts! Tomorrow I’ll try another way and if I fail then well I’ve found another way on how not to approach a certain issue.
Steve Harvey said and I quote “It doesn’t matter how many times you have failed, you only have to succeed once and your life is never the same again.” It got to me and it really got me thinking. The one time you succeed is all that matters, it is all people will see. We look at Jack Ma founder of Alibaba.com, he failed so many times but it only took one success for him to become a multi billion business owner. He failed 2 primary school tests, he was rejected by Harvard 10 times and when McDonald’s first launched in China his application for a job was rejected too but look at him now.
Giving up is the greatest failure.
In life we will fail so many times but it is important not to lose perspective. It is not about how many times you tried and failed . What matters is that you never gave up.
Charlie Chaplin said and I quote,
“Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself.”
It takes courage to chase your dreams, it takes courage to pursue a career and it takes courage to be “who you are”. Forget about failure just take the leap. You might fail but at least you had the courage to try. You had the courage to pursue your purpose and that to me is worth more than never having to have tried at all. I can stand the feeling of failure, it isn’t permanent, I only need to rise and try again but I can never stand the feeling of regret when am old and grey and I look back at my life and my journey and I see that my fear of failure prevented me from pursuing my purpose.
So you failed?
Get over it
Rise up and try one more time and this time you will have all the lessons from your past failures to help you through.
Failure is simply an opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.
Do not let the fear of failure keep you from pursuing your dreams. Embrace it, it’s part of the process where growth is. It is not failure that stops us but giving up does.
If you made it right to the end I believe I’ve given you the keys to failing with Grace. Firstly ask yourself why. When you get the answers learn from the experience. Secondly, never give up because giving up is the greatest failure. Thirdly change your perspective, you didn’t fail you just found a way on how not to do something. Fourthly you need to accept the fact that failure is inevitable and guess what you only have to succeed where it counts and your life will never be the same. Finally have the courage to pursue your passion despite the outcome.
Am glad you made it up to the end of this article and remember to fail Gracefully in all your endeavors.
I’ll leave you with this Quote from Oprah;
“Think like a queen, a queen is not afraid to Fail. Failure is another stepping stone to greatness.”